Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
