Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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