somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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