It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
