at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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