guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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