i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
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