lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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