Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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