it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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