I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
