69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize