after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
