i don't like sucking hair
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
