Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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