So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
