I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize