You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize