you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
