worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
