8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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