all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
