i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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