I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
