Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
