i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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