this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My ass is underappreciated
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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