Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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