Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize