You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
