fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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