there's paper in my vomit.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize