He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
