Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize