How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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