Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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