Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize