Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
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