oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
