i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
