I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I'm passing your future prison.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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