This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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