Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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