I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
