Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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