Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
