Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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