well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Randomize
