y did u give ur computer a hand job?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize