This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize